Friday, August 03, 2007

Teasing stranded commuters on the T

MBTA riders are a patient lot. When I was waiting for a Red Line train on Wednesday evening, and the PA system announced delays due to "a switching problem," there was a lot of eye-rolling on the Downtown Crossing platform, but no one seemed too angry. These things happen. It was only when the T ran its "greatest hits" announcements that the temperature started to rise. Every time we heard the bong alerting us to an announcement, me and my fellow passengers (or aspiring passengers) hoped to hear: "The next Red Line train to Alewife is now arriving." But we kept plunging back into despair. First, there was the "If you see something, say something" spiel, reminding people to freak out at the sight of unattended umbrellas and the like. Then there was the no smoking announcement, for some reason in Spanish (and only in Spanish). ¿Qué el infierno? After these letdowns, there was the announcement of a train arriving on the opposite platform, which is forgivable if annoying. But the next bong heralded the suggestion that Red Sox attendees buy roundtrip fare tickets so they wouldn't have to wait in line to buy more tickets after the game. Too late! They've already paid their fares and are waiting on the platform. Perhaps the voice of God should tell them how to get to the park if the Red Line train never arrives. (Just walk one block to the Green Line at Park Street, you clueless suburbanites.) Fortunately, the train showed up before we got any more helpful hints from Uncle Dan. Is it too much to ask that non-service-related announcements be shut off when we're all wondering how we're going to get home? Or maybe the T could replace that bong with a voice whispering, "Don't get your hopes up" before we get the canned verbiage.



Anonymous Matthew Sachs said...

One of the announcements in particular gets on my nerves. It's the one that goes something like, "This is Dan 'I don't ride this, you plebians' Grabauskas, reminding you that bombs are everywhere and you might die at any minute. So be terrified, because the terrorists have won."

8/03/2007 03:43:00 PM  
Blogger Robert David Sullivan said...

The T should play a recording of FDR saying, "We have nothing to fear but fear itself." Or a recording of the more contemporary response to terrorism: "Go out and buy stuff!"

8/03/2007 04:05:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

haha, My fav is the announcement telling us all to turn eachother into authorities if we are acting suspicious. Can we say E. Germany circa 1960?

8/04/2007 11:54:00 AM  

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